Many people can look back on their lives and name numerous things they have failed in. The brain has no problem going back in time and dwelling on past events that were a total failure. For example, recalling the job interview that you were so nervous you could hardly breathe or focus. Or the day you found out you had to file bankruptcy and your home went into foreclosure.
It’s funny how we as humans tend to keep the failing experiences floating around in our heads just to relive them over and over again. Then there’s the moment just before a golden opportunity arise your mind starts to think back on your failures, and you start to doubt that anything good could happen to you. Maybe you’re just unlucky and you blame it on the cards you were dealt. Just to make yourself feel better you convince yourself into thinking you never wanted the good things anyway and you could really live without them.
You start to feel you didn’t deserve to have good things happen to you. After all it must be something you’re doing wrong, because nothing has changed for the better, things are just getting worse. It doesn’t help that everyone around you is doing much better than you. Then you begin to think about all the bad things that happened to you. The more you think about all the terrible things the worse you start to feel. Before you know it you’re feeling depressed and don’t know what it takes to feel better.
Many times we tend to look at failure in a negative way. Try looking at them as experiences that produce certain results, and strive for a better outcome. Realize that you failed at nothing and sometimes these experiences are needed to grow and move on to a higher place. Try not to place any blame on yourself or others this usually leads to negative feelings and will lead you back to your feelings of failure.
Start visualizing how you would like things to be instead of how you see your life now. Begin to feel better about yourself. Tell yourself that you deserve to feel better. Before you know it you’ll be thinking about the present and not the past.
Your life may even begin to get better but your mind may go back to what it knows best dwelling on your past. Sometimes old habits die hard. When these negative feelings start to creep up inside you continue to visualize exactly how you want your life to be.
Some people need something they can see each day to keep them on track. For example: Say you desire to be a pilot. Write down your goal. Keep a picture of a pilot in a special place so that you can see it on a regular basis.
Enroll in a class and by taking these steps you’ll be working towards your goals in the present.
Sometimes people tend to see themselves through other peoples eyes which is not cool because if they view you in a negative way, you’ll limit yourself. Define who you are by using affirmations. Using affirmations continuously creates belief. As the saying goes “say it enough and you’ll actually believe it”
Some affirmations you can tell yourself
I am smart.
I am well.
I am succeeding.
I am moving in the right direction.
I am financially stable.
Expect Good Things to Happen
If you expect positive results they will most likely show up in your life.
If you’re expecting negative results it probably means you’re not striving for a better outcome and you may be focused on your past.
Surround yourself with positive people to keep you focused on your goal. Do not focus on the naysayer. Remember what you focus on in the present will determine your future. Continue to strive for positive outcomes and you’ll be just fine.
Author: written by Frances Garvin Author of The Revolving Door
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